Sticks and Rocks

Ever since  I was old enough to need to shop for Christmas gifts, I have shopped Black Friday with my Dad and sisters. Some years it’s just me and one other person. Other years all four of us get up early, grab coffee, and hit a couple of stores. Sometimes we don’t buy very much. When the kids were very small, and into actual toys, it made Christmas a bit cheaper.

So last night I decided to hit the Toys R Us sale at midnight. Then I was going to go to Kohl’s at 4am and Walmart at 5am. Before the sale papers came to my door yesterday morning, the kids’ lists were short and almost complete. Then I started looking through the ads and feeling that frenzy to make sure my kids had the best holiday possible by buying them lots and lots of stuff.

I admit it, I let the feeling get to me this time of year. Christmas is one of the special times I remember growing up. We had such a great time that I get depressed when I can’t be with my family at Christmas. I want my kids to have that same thought when they are grown. So, I hesitate not to buy something they want or I wonder if we have enough for them each year…even when the space under the tree is piled high and stockings are so heavy they can’t be hung.  THEY NEED MORE STUFF so they’ll love Christmas as much as I do!!!

Then I look back at my childhood Christmas memories. We got stuff, don’t get me wrong, but we got a few things and a stocking. I remember a few of my favorite things, but not the bulk of the list over the years. What I remember is that we always got a family game as a gift and my parents would let us open it on Christmas Eve after church. We’d play a round while we sipped eggnog that my mom made and nibbled cookies that we had helped decorate. Then we’d set out something for Santa and head to one of my sisters’ bedrooms to camp out on the floor together and wait for morning. (This was such an important tradition for my youngest sister that she made Todd do it the first year he was with us!).

The next morning, after gifts, we’d eat a huge breakfast with my mom’s cream cheese bread hot out of the oven, get dressed and visit both sets of grandparents before the day was over. December 25th is my birthday, so I’d have at least two cakes and two or three rounds of “Happy Birthday to You” before I went to sleep. Revelation…MY MEMORIES DON’T REALLY INVOLVE GETTING STUFF!!! (I know, they involve food…that’s another blog post entirely!)

So, back to last night…I actually did drive to Toys R Us. (1 hr to get there and get into the parking lot). I walked up to the line (which only had about 200 people when I got there, but was stretched around the building within 15 minutes). I stood in line for 20 minutes or so and all those memories from my younger days started running through my mind. I realized that the ONE toy I was in line for was for my youngest…who didn’t even ask for it…who doesn’t care whether he gets a new train set, but would rather I just sit down and play trains with him and the old set. I realized that the reason I wanted to be there was to be with my family…but I was alone.

Then I started thinking about my recent blog posts about the “gimmes” and my kids’ consumer mentality. I looked around and found myself in the midst of the very thing I want to eradicate in their lives. I was suddenly embarrassed to be there…so I left. I just left and drove home. The further I got away, the better I felt. I climbed into bed and slept soundly and there wasn’t a package hidden away anywhere in house! There were no impulse, guilty purchases or toys and junk grabbed because there was a limited number available.

This morning, I ordered a slightly less fancy, slightly more expensive train set for Brice online. He’ll be thrilled. The kids will have plenty of Christmas. After all, they are lucky enough to have generous grandparents and aunts and uncles. But I’ll make sure that our December is about giving and sharing and playing. So, I’m back to my theory of giving sticks and rocks this year. If Santa brought sticks and rocks I bet they’d play with them…and I bet they’d always remember that Christmas!